Christmas 2007

I am sitting in my recliner taking in everything that is around me. The Christmas tree is glowing with all of its ornaments still in tact after the mad rush for the goodies that lay in wait for the kids early this morning. The fan is gently blowing and rotating on its stand and the candles are glowing from different parts of the house. Katy is knitting another blanket of some sort and Justin is beating up the keyboard on the computer behind me as he is trapped in the world of Runescape. The rain is falling outside and I can hear the rhythmic drum of the water drops on our tin roof. Kristina and her friend are in her bedroom using the new Playstation 2 and playing Karaoke and singing along. The Playstation 2 was Justin’s gift but the Karaoke game and microphones that came with it were an instant hit with my princess who loves to sing.

Christmas 2007 came in with little to no fan fare this year. We did not have the funds to do much other than put the tree up after Thanksgiving. Luckily we already have a fake tree since the real ones cost more than we can afford this year. We had some extra lights that we might have been able to salvage and put up outside but some of the bulbs were burned out and it would have just been easier to replace them. Putting up outside lights also reminds me that it would put an extra strain on our light bill which needs no help from the Holiday season to get larger. I have been consciously trying to put the light bill on a crash diet. That tends to relieve some of the tension on the budget that has been screaming at us since July of this year. Our last light bill was around 260.00 and I was almost excited about that.

That reminds me of the ridiculous gas prices that we have been paying here on the East Coast. I understand that it is much higher in other areas of the US however it does not make me feel better when gas prices are almost 3.00 for a gallon of regular unleaded. I think the price for Christmas day is 2.79 for regular unleaded at Raceway which is the cheapest place in town to get some go go juice. Sometimes you can get it for two or three cents cheaper per gallon if you drive to the local Walmart in Duck Ditch and get one of their discount gas cards and buy it at their pumps. If the prices of gasoline or electricity is not enough to kill your budget try going to the grocery store and buy bread or a gallon of milk. I think Katy told me the other day that a gallon of milk is around 5.00 per gallon and bread is around 1.49 and that is the cheap stuff. That makes the cost of gasoline seem a little less expensive if you ask me.

Justin and Kristina got three or four presents apiece under the tree and luckily Mr and Mrs Clause had some help to make up the difference so that the kids could have a relatively decent Christmas. I wish we could have done more however that was just not going to be a reality this year. One of the problems with Christmas time around our house is that the kids were spoiled thanks to being sponsored by several local grocery stores for Christmas after our Jessica died. Jessica died in August of 2001 and from 2001 to 2004 the kids made out pretty nicely for Christmas. In 2005 through this year there just was no comparison between what the companies could do for the kids and what we could do. Upon further reflection I am thinking that perhaps it went on way too long. I am thankful for the support and I am glad it was there however it set an expectation for the kids in which they started to expect the same level of giving from year to year.

Is Christmas really defined by how many gifts are under the tree and how much junk we can accumulate from year to year? Don’t get me wrong, I like nice gifts like the next person however I don’t think that those gifts in and of themselves can not bring joy or inner contentment. At very best it might bring a very short lived happiness. Does the Christmas tree really have anything to do with Christmas other than being a part of our western culture? Was Jesus really born on December 25 and if not why do we spend so much time and energy on this holiday? I think perhaps that it is so easy for us to get caught up in the activities of the season and get so busy with this and that which causes us to lose sight of what Christmas is all about.

This Christmas I choose to focus on all those things which are positives in my life. I have a wonderful family and we are all together and in fairly good health. I have a good job to go to and that provides us with the funds to pay most of the bills and living expenses. I have a wonderful relationship with my wife of 18 years. The two kids that currently live with us are teenagers which presents its own unique set of problems but all in all they are good kids. I have several wonderful friends who are my friends despite my failures and weaknesses. We live in a safe place and we have a roof over our heads. The bottom line is that while we can always wish for more stuff or money we have all of our needs met and some of our wants as well. While I can not compare myself with others I must say that there are plenty of folks all around me that are probably not doing anywhere near as good as we are.

This morning I gave myself a gift that will continue to keep on giving and that was the gift of exercise. I chose to get off of my posterior and vacate my comfy recliner and left the world of cyberspace to take a nice long walk. It was a difficult decision to make because it would have been so easy to just drink another cup of java and get lost on the digital information super highway. I have spent 19 years working in I.T. and I spend a lot of time working on technology so naturally I find myself wanting to enjoy technology in my spare time. The only problem with that is it does not burn many calories. I decided this morning as I walked that I need to spend less time with the distractions of life and try to spend more time getting focused on those things that matter the most.

What matters most to me is that I become the best I can be in several areas of my life or my life purposes. I want to be a better husband, family leader, father to my children, and servant in my local church. I discovered this morning during my walk that the only way that I can discover how to be better at my life purposes is to rid myself of things that can hold me back. I know that grief, pain, and being super critical of who I am by comparing myself to others will only continue to hinder me. All I can do is take one day at a time and do the best I can with what I have and leave all the other junk that I have little to no control over in Gods hands.

James Moffitt
http://www.lightourworld.com
http://moffittjc.blogharbor.com/blog
james.moffitt@comcast.net