Back from Myrtle Beach South Carolina

Katy and I just got back from a weekend at Mrytle Beach SC. We arrived at 4pm Friday afternoon and got back home today at 1pm. We had a blast to say the least. It appears that the Happy Days organization has a ministry both to children with cancer or other diseases but also to parents after the child passes on. Happy Days and special events sponsors a weekend get away each year for parents. There were 25 couples there.
Katy and I and one other couple were the newbies in this fraternity of parents who have lost children to cancer. Jessica went to be with the Lord 5 months ago and this other couple lost their child on November 8 of last year.

Saturday was spent in grief counseling. I have to say that while this was a difficult time for Katy and I it was necessary. We learned that pain is a part of living but that misery is optional. In other words we learned that while our pain is intense and our experience devestating there is life after loosing a loved one to cancer. In theory we knew that already but it is hard to get beyond the pain and loss. We learned that there were three couples here in Goose Creek that have been through the same thing. That means that we have met some other folks that live in our area that understand exactly what we are going through and they might be able to help us through this during this next year.

Debbie Stevenson who is the director and vision for Happy Days and Special events (aka Camp Happy Days) is an incredible woman with a special gift for reaching out to the lives of sick children and their parents and bringing happiness and laughter to difficult situations. We had an opportunity to spend some one on one time with Debbie late last night and it was a neat experience just to hear her talk about her 20 years of growth in her organization and all the children and parents that she has had an opportunity to touch. I believe that she said that she has over 200 families who have been affected by a child that has died by cancer. Apparently a small portion of the parents take advantage of the activities that they sponsor.

Saturday morning after breakfast they had a financial counselor who spoke on the importance of getting our finances in order and then they broke up the females and males seperately into their own special support groups. Our pastor, Tom Glisson and Mark Smith from Mcalistar and Smith funeral homes were the facilitators of the mens group. Most of the men stated that they had never been to the couples retreat the first year after their child had died because the pain was just too intense and they did not want to deal with it. Apparently I am one of the few that actually has done this that they know of. I told them that I did not go because I was wanting to be there but because Katy had really been looking forward to being there. Katy needed a break from the children and seemed to enjoy herself.

After everyone finished breakfast John Evans , who is a motivational speaker, spoke to use about coping with grief and change in our environments. You can visit John's website at http://www.johnevansspeaker.com/. I plan on purchasing his book online. He is a VERY good speaker and blessed us with the things he had to say.
All things considered I am VERY glad that we made the effort to go on this trip. We both needed a break and it was good to make another step in understanding the grief process and getting on with our lives as a family unit.

God bless