The dust has settled and we have been in our metal shoe box for three weeks. As far as shoe boxes go this one is nice compared to the one we lived in when we lived in Acworth Georgia. We lived in Red Barn Mobile Park and boy that was a dump and a half. We were one of the few folks that had two cars with shiny paint and a telephone line with Internet connectivity. You could here the people now. Hey mister, what is that funny looking box in yer living room??

I wonder if the street names or towns that you live on have any reflection on your past or future? When we lived in Simpsonville we lived on "Broken Past" street. Now we live in Travelers Rest. I have to say that WE certainly could use some REST and we fully qualify as TRAVELERS since we have moved over 20 times in the last 14 years. Katy keeps saying that we are gypsies for Jesus. I told someone the other day that we moved to Travelers Rest and they told me that we are in the dead center of "rednecksville". Oh well, what else is new in the deep south?

Our lives seem to have stabilized somewhat. We managed to get our utility bills paid up so that we could transfer our power and cable utilities to our new home. We even managed to pay off MaBell and get our home phone turned back on. Our rent is cheap enough now that we can manage it with my unemployment benefits. We live in a very quiet and secluded neighborhood with one house and three trailers. I hardly hear a peep out of any of the surrounding folks so that suits me just fine. Peace and quiet is just what the doctor ordered for us.

July of 2003 finds me in a business partnership with a local business owner who has agreed to finance a new computer business venture. Primarily we are focusing on the sale and repair/upgrades of used and refurbished systems. We are opening a cellular and computer store in the Fiesta Mexicana by the Civic Center on Cedar Lane in Greenville. I will be at the new store in the afternoon and evenings and still selling computers at the flea market on White Horse Road on Sat and Sunday. Katy may be learning how to sell cellular phones and accessories so we may be partners at the three tables at Whitehorse soon.

I am still looking for an IT job but thus far nothing has surfaced. Katy is taking a small break but I am sure that sometime in July or August after the kids go back to school (public) that she will renew her job search. Katy is fighting a staff infection and had a cyst that needed to be removed.

Our Angel (black lab) who got run over by a truck seems to have stabilized some. Angel will never be the dog she once was. She can barely walk because her right rear leg is messed up. I miss being able to rough house with her and play. Now it seems that all she can do is just lay around and watch everything going on around her. In some ways this incident has sent us through flash backs of how Jessica changed as a child when she was diagnosed with cancer. One day Jessica was a normal 8 year old girl and then before you know it she has blinding headaches and dizzy spells and winds up being diagnosed with a brain tumor. Over 14 months we watched her change from being a healthy vibrant girl to being so sick she could not even hold up her head to eat. Sigh.....

Sammy , our new resident puppy is quite the character. Sammy is approximately 4 inches long, 3 inches high and weighs in at about half a pound. You can not believe the energy this puppy has and how much noise he can generate. Sammy is the gift that keeps on giving now that I think about it since we are trying to teach him how to go outside to do his business. We should have named Sammy "Kujo" since he thinks he is a big dog and wants to attack anything that slightly resembles something bigger than himself. A puppy with an attitude.

I am hoping that I can find someone that knows computers well enough that can work for me at the flea market on Sundays so that we can find a church to attend here in Travelers Rest. It has been almost 3 months since we attended a church service or had regular fellowship with other believers. We have our friends and extended family on the Internet but that just does not replace face to face contact with brothers and sisters in real life. Katy and I have struggled on and off with the idea of trying to maintain some sort of relationship with other couples in real life but it seems that we keep failing miserably in that department. I think that the biggest factor for this is that most folks are just not inclined to be outgoing people persons. Most folks tend to want to stay to themselves and do not encourage much more than a superficial relationship at best. People are willing to socialize for 10 or 15 minutes at church and maybe go out to eat afterwards but anything past that seems to be a huge struggle. Maybe everyone is just too busy to develop relationships outside of their immediate families. Sometimes Katy and I wonder if we are just so messed up that no one wants to have anything to do with us outside of the church atmosphere. My doctor said I would be fine, he just did not say when. :) For those of you that DO know me you know what I just said and how I mean it.

This week will be spent putting together our new space that will be used as a computer warehouse for parts and a staging area where they will be worked on. We have to move some steel shelving from one storage area to another and then I have to set up four computers in our new store front so we can begin to try and sell them there. I will be there from 4pm until 9 pm Tuesday Wed and Thursday. Katy will probably be there on Monday and Friday while my bowling leagues are going on. The interesting and challenging thing about where we are going to sell the computers is that the area is predominantly Hispanic. That means that I will be learning some Spanish so that I can communicate more effectively with the customers. That ought to be fun....

As the old saying goes "When it rains it pours". We have been experiencing a torrential down pour at our house with regards to the garbage that has been happening.

Tuesday afternoon Katy received a call from her work telling her that they were terminating her employment. Katy lasted two weeks at this job and we both feel as if they did not give her a fair opportunity to address the "supposed" issues. Katy did the same type of work at MUSC in Charleston without any problems. We just paid the deposit on a single wide trailer that is 10 minutes from her job and now that job is gone. Maybe we would not have found the trailer if it had not been for the job?

Yesterday, after we were done with the flea market Katy and the kids took the station wagon over to the new location in Travelers Rest to verify the power had been turned on and the turn on the AC. Angel, our lab , got loose and was run over by a truck. Angel is alive but she is not doing that great. Katy and Kristina were pretty upset about the whole thing. Angel is like one of the children and is very special to us.
I believe that Angel probably wont play "chicken" with anymore vehicles for some time to come.

Today is the day we take our children to Camp Happy Days for a one week stay. Justin and Kristina have been counting the days and hours until this week. I am glad they are actually going to get to go. While they are gone we will be moving our stuff from Simpsonville out to Travelers Rest. One positive about this new location is that it is out in the country and is in a very quiet location.

Seven days and counting before we have to be out of Simpsonville.
We made arrangements to move within 10 minutes of Katy's job and she found out that they let her go yesterday. The excuse for letting her go was that she was afraid of the patients and she was not taking the blood pressure readings to their liking. Katy thinks that she was doing just fine and that one of the certified nursing assistants was talking trash about her to the boss. Maybe the job just was not to be? Atleast we have an almost full paycheck coming out of this fiasco on July 3rd which will help us tremendously.

On the positive side of things we will be living in cheaper accomodations and I will be able to afford them on what I get with unemployment and what I make at the flea market on the weekend.
Things will be extremely tight but that is better than being homeless or living in a motel for weeks on end.

When it rains it pours. I wonder what is in store for us next??

Ten days and counting. That is how long it will be before we are moved out of Simpsonville SC to Travelers Rest SC. We found a single wide trailer with 3 bedrooms and 2 baths to move into. The landlord there was willing to work with us with regards to paying rent by the week and the deposit was low enough so that we could afford it. We were starting to think that we would have to stay in a motel for 4 to 8 weeks while we found something that was affordable. Now we dont have to worry about getting a storage place for our stuff. Wahooooo!

We will be taking Justin and Kristina to Camp Happy Days on Sunday and then picking them back up the following Saturday. We will be moved into our new location by the time we pick them up.
The kids decided that they liked the new digs which is cool.

We have twelve days to move. Our landlord informed us that his soon to be ex wife owns the rental property that we are in and that she needs to move in since they are separated now. We cant really afford the house anyway and knew that we needed to move to something cheaper. This is forcing us to do the move now instead of in October. The search for a place to stay is in full swing. Thus far everyone wants first and last month rent to move in. My money tree is bare so that is not going to work for us.

We are having a moving sale and listing things on Iwanna.com to see if we can generate some extra income and lighten our moving load. In August of 1997 we sold everything we owned and moved to Douglasville Georgia. It took us almost 7 years to reaquire everything we sold. I told Katy that this was the last time I am doing this. No more working to acquire stuff that I am just going to have to sell anyway.

Our home phone is off and the cell phone and Internet connection will go next unless we can find the funds to pay the bills soon. If that happens we should be back online within 4 to 6 weeks. If you are reading this and we have your home phone number we will be in contact during that time to let you know how we are doing.

On the bright side of things Katy does have a job and I do have unemployment coming in until Feb of 2004. Those two things keep us from being totally indigent. PTL for that aye?

I know that we are not alone and that there are other folks that are in a pickle just like us. All we know is that we need a rest from this constant barrage of life changing events. We are weary since everything seems to be happening all at the same time. We need a break.

Come soon Lord Jesus come soon. I think that this family is more than ready....

I am starting to think that we live in a rain forrest and that we skipped summer and went straight into winter. This weekend was spent at the flea market and the temperature was 53 and it rained more than not. If you would have asked me on Saturday morning if I thought we would be able to make enough money to be profitable for the weekend I would have said no. Nevertheless going to the flea market is something we can do for ourselves to better our unemployment blues. We owe we owe so off to work we go is our motto. Some of you work Monday through Friday from 8 until 5 and we work Wed, Saturday and Sunday. We do not necessarily like it but for now it is helping us to stay afloat. My prayer on Saturday morning was two fold. I prayed that the Lord would turn the water spigot off and that he would send people with disposable income. God answered both of my prayers but not necessarily in the order or timing that I would have expected. Saturday morning the water spigot was turned off for about an hour which gave us time to unload our cars and get set up. Then the water was turned back on. We needed to rake together 293.00 to cover a rent check and the light bill that needs to clear our checking account this week. Thanks to our being able to sell Katy's computer we were able to get almost twice that amount which means the immediate emergency is taken care of. Thank you Jesus for providing for us in this way. Did I have the faith that God would provide this weekend? I guess that in some small way that I did because I did go out there even though I thought in my flesh and spirit that there was NO way that people would come to the flea market in the cold and rain.

I did not sell Katy's computer until 2:00 pm on Sunday when this guy walked up and was slightly interested in the deal. This person told me that they had been looking for a long time for a good deal and a good deal he certainly got. I told him that I thought God probably sent him by my table that day and that I was extremely thankful for his purchase. I also found out that this person also sells and works on computers and buys them in bulk which means that I may have made another local contact with someone that could provide me with consignment machines.

If I were to have it my way I would have a full time job making what I am used to make and we would not have to worry about bills and when they get paid. I believe that God has other ideas about providing for our family. Gods word says that we will never beg for bread and that our basic needs will be taken care of. Even though I have been under employed and over appreciated for over 95 days now we have not had to loose anything with regards to utilities and service. We have had to choose to sell off some of the extra STUFF that we have which are not required for every day life. Thusly Katy's computer has a new home. Are we happy about our belongings becoming a savings account for the flea market? No, we are not happy. The important thought here is that our happiness does not necessarily equate to our needs being met. Wants and temporary happiness do add up though. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy or experiencing happiness. What causes us problems though is when we prioritize our lives in such a way that we make decisions based on what makes us happy and fulfilled. We can not live our lives according to our emotional feelings but rather according to those priorities and purpose that God has for us at the moment.

I would rather that my needs be supplied abundantly and in advance so that my faith would not have to be tested on a daily basis. I would rather be happy and not have to experience stress and anxiety because of the bills that are piling up. The million dollar question is this. If everything is taken care of and there are no needs or dependency upon me to trust in Christ how much faith do I have and how much glory is given to Christ? When we are weak He is strong. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God.
If all of my needs are provided for and I do not have to strain or struggle with regards to hearing God then what will get my attention? When I am happy and everything is going my way will I choose to HEAR God or will I fill my days with the activities of life that will drown Him out? How will others see God working in my life? How will I grow in grace and spiritual maturity if my happiness is continually determined by temporary events and stuff that just clutters up my life?

We are not alone in this struggle. There are a lot of people who are unemployed and struggling to make ends meet. Perhaps we are going through this so that we can learn how to live with less and how to maintain our faith and JOY despite of our external circumstances. Someone reminded me of Job recently. What we are experiencing is a JOKE compared to that. Compared to Job and how HE reacted to what HE experienced I have been reduced into a sniveling clot of whimpering whining. The ouch factor on that is pretty severe but sometimes we need to be yanked out of our pity parties aye?

I am hopeful that out of the whining, wailing and knashing of teeth that I will learn what I am supposed to learn and that I will be able to share what I am learning in such a way as to impact the lives of others and produce spiritual fruit and life and restoration in the way that God would have me to.

Blessings to you our friends. May God bless you and keep you as you walk out your walk of faith this day and week.

In His service
James Moffitt

A friend and co laborer in Christ wrote the following thoughts and questions and I was inspired to write my thoughts below.

I look around me, being me, and I ask, "Why Lord!" And I also ask, "How, Lord! ... How can we do what you've called us to do! ... What you've called me to do!"


I think that one of our problems is that we get so caught up in all of the tiny details of our lives and all our problems and circumstances. Doing this causes us to have tunnel vision and we fail to see the big picture.

God is not finished working on us yet and while He does not expect us to be perfect like Himself He does expect us to work towards an attitude and lifestyle of holiness, spiritual humility and contrition. The process of holiness and being made completely unto His image lasts a life time and sometimes when we see our human fragilities and we become critical of our failures and think to ourselves that we are failures. The liar and deceiver of our souls are always ready to show us our imperfections and tendencies to have wicked and evil thought lives.

What separates us from the love of Christ? The bible says that NOTHING can separate us from His love. His love is perfect, his love is eternal, and his grace is for you and me. Nevertheless we get so caught in our own mental and spiritual and emotional traps that we forget whom we are and whom we belong to. We are then ensnared by our own emotional, spiritual and sometimes physical chains of bondage.

If you take a Christian and put him or her next to an unbeliever what would you say makes us different? What is supposed to make us different? The only thing that separates us from the chaff is that we are saved by Grace and the Holy Spirit of God resides in our hearts. Do we really think that our holiness is purely driven by our own self constraint and self control? No, our ability to be holy because He is Holy is because of His power and mercy and grace that resides within us and shines forth like the noonday sun. The more we die to ourselves and the more we release control of our lives to the Holy Spirit the more HE can change our lives from the inside out and the more we can radiate the love of Christ and the mercy of God to those who are around us.

If we are not radiating the love and mercy and truth of God to others in our communities it is because there is something keeping that from happening. What is keeping the love of God from being radiated from our lives to those that are around us? Are we walking the walk consistently or are we talking the talk? Does our faith walk shine forth with a life full of confidence and integrity or do we compromise our faith when we think it is convenient or profitable to do so?

When will we get beyond the works mentality? We think that if we attend church religiously every time the church doors are open that we have satisfied some sort of requirement. We carry our bibles and note pads to the pews and take notes. We smile and say nice things to people around us and appear to be the people we are supposed to be. Inside we are sick and dying because of all the infirmities and hidden skeletons in our closed up closets. How can we as the living church of God reach our communities when we ourselves need intensive care? Evil will always reside in this fallen world and there will not be peace on earth as long as our enemy is allowed to wander this earth. God's people however can and shall make the difference in the lives of those who are lost and dying and headed to hell. We are the ONLY JESUS that some people will ever see. We have the truth in our hearts because we have been given the truth. We must tell people around us what the bible says about Gods love and His desire to set them free from the bondages of sin and death. We can not do that effectively if we appear to be just as sick and in bondage as the next person. Can we?

We need to figure out how to get past the quest for more and more knowledge and information and get to the point where we can live what we know.
When we can figure out how to encourage one another, love one another, rebuke one another, speak truth into one another's lives then we will be able to have restoration, healing and integrity in our own lives.

I would love to talk about some "real" stuff that keeps us prisoners to sin and defeat. How can we put our faith into action and make a "real" difference?

God loves you so much that He made the ultimate sacrifice. Today He stands ready with open arms to heal us and restore us and give us the power we need to live and lead in a fallen world.

In His Name
James Moffitt

Lets review for a moment on all of the "stuff" that has to be reloaded on your computer "after" you rip out the motherboard and install a new one. Nah, lets skip that list. You would be asleep in no time. I will tell you that I just reinstalled w.blogger that is the windows based tool that allows me to post to my Web Log (blogger) when I get the urge to do so. I guess this means that I have the urge to do so since you are reading this.

Winter bowling leagues are coming to an end. Friday nights are over and Tuesday night league just ended. That means that I can fill those nights with other more important tasks. Dont get me wrong, I love to bowl but too much of a good thing can become a drag. Bowling on four leagues was just a bit too much. This summer I will bowl on Monday night and I think that will be about all. I have a Sunday night league that starts at 8pm that will be ending in the next 2 weeks and then that will be over. We won 3rd place on our Tuesday night spare timers league and I gathered up three patches and one pin for bowling over 200 on several occasions. Now I need a bowling shirt to put those on.

I have two books that I want to read in the month of May and June if I can manage to prioritize my life to do so. The Purpose Driven Life and the Purpose Driven Church by Rick Warren. Let me give you a glimpse of what the Purpose Driven Life has to offer and how it is changing my life in a positive way. Here is a quote by George Bernard Shaw that just dinged me between the eyes.

"This is the true joy of life: the being used up for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; being a force of nature instead of a feverish , selfish little clot of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy"


Can you say ouch and double ouch? I have a red spot between my eyeballs when that sucker slammed head first into my noggin. I am continually reminded that life is just not fair and bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. Imagine that for a moment? My life perspective is my life perspective so humor me as I go down this road for a second. My perspective is that life has certainly had its fair share of negatives since June of 2000. Between June of 2000 and today I have been in survival mode. I have been enduring life and responding to the circumstances and consequences of things. Doing this has put me in a pretty foul mood to the point of affecting my health , my family and my friends.
Gosh, did I forget to put the most important thing in my life here? More importantly my relationship with God has been affected too.

People that know me and are privy to all of the events that have unfolded since June of 2000 would tell you that we handled our situation very well and that we did not allow our situation to destroy our faith in God. All I can say is that if we did glorify God through all of this mess then I have to give the praise and honor and glory back to God because it was nothing that we did. God brings glory to himself through his children sometimes without them being aware of it and through His divine will and intervention. God also brings glory to himself through a life of brokeness and obedience to His word. There were times when I screamed at God and got angry. Lets just say that God does have a sense of humor and I am happy that I am still alive to write this.

Loosing my job in Feburary has set into motion a chain of events that have ADDED to the stress levels at the Moffitt house. Remember that I said earlier that bad things happen to good people. Loosing my job which was our ONLY source of income to pay bills was a BAD thing. I also have to say that my responses at times to this stress has not necessarily given any glory to God either. I responded to the stress by withdrawing into myself and lashing out at other people who care about me. I responded by trying to do things like bowling that made me happy. The problem with trying to bury bad things and unfortunate circumstances with things that make you happy is that happiness is circumstantial and it only lasts for a brief period of time. When the event is over that makes you happy you find yourself face to face with the problems again.

Survival mode has lasted for long enough. Out with the OLD mindset and in with the new. Instead of being a survivalist in a fallen world and being tossed too and fro through the whirlwinds of emotional chaos I am going to choose to realign my life with the purposes that God has for me and my family. I am going to choose to redefine the things that make me happy and rediscover the Hope that is within me. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. The only way that I can cling on to hope is to immerse myself in faith building activities such as prayer, reading the word of God and other resources that will give me what I need for restoration. Does that mean that I will no longer have problems? No, it means that I am going to do what I can to let God redefine how I am going to react to these problems. Is the glass half full or half empty? Will good come out of bad or not? Will I approach life with a positive , humble and contrite spirit or will I try to tackle everything by myself and put my faith and hope in my ability to provide for my family?

I need to learn how to be who God wants me to be despite how others respond to me. In the past I have tried to develop relationships with others and when they did not respond in the correct way I either found fault in them or I would withdraw into myself and blame myself for some type of fault that was keeping people from responding. If people do not respond like I expect them or want them to then I will not be myself anymore. I will just become an introvert and stop reaching out to people. The only problem with that is my attitude towards people and I am short circuiting who I am in Christ because of those attitudes.

I can not let how others respond or not respond define who I am.
I must not continue to keep my eyes on people because as long as I do I will be disappointed. No one is perfect, not one. I must keep my eyes and mind focused on Christ. I need to allow people to be who they are and let the Holy Spirit be the one to convict them of whatever problems they might have within the dimensions of his authority and timing. Only the Holy Spirit can convict people of sin and change them. I can not and should not try to be anyone's Holy Spirit.

If you are reading this and you are not a Christian then you probably do not understand what I am talking about. I would imagine that you probably have not even gotten this far in my writings today. You probably have zipped through some of this and just gone on to other things. For those of you that are my friends and who follow my babbling from time to time I hope that my being brutally honest and real does not scare you away. I hope that my being real will not only be therapeutic to me as an individual but that it in turn will encourage you to know that you are not the only one that struggles with spiritual turmoil. The only way that we can grow in grace is by being real with God and with one another and to encourage one another to reach out to God with a spirit of repentance and humility so that God can restore us into a right relationship with Him and with one another. God is in the restoration business and He is not done with me yet !

May 15th 2003 is upon us. Actually, the day is almost half gone. What have I accomplished? Does mowing the backyard and returning consignment computer equipment to my distributer count?
What have you accomplished today?

Recently I upgraded my Gateway PIII 866 mhz workstation to a 1.1 gigglehertz motherboard and 640 mb of ram. Can you say ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM??

How many people who are supposed computer geeks told me that I would never be able to upgrade my Gateway because it was too proprietary? More of them than not. My Gateway is housed in a typical ATX motherboard with a 300 watt power supply. It was a simple as out with the old and in with the new. The only problem we ran into was with the case and the front USB cabling. To get around the proprietary wiring scheme we just put a USB card into an empty pci slot in the back and now I have four USB ports just like before. The only change is that they are all in the back instead of two in front. No big deal.

I LOVE how fast this new machine is. It boots up 3x as fast and the applications are much zippier. Wahoooo!

When was the last time you ran live update on your Anti Virus software running on your computer? This serves as a reminder to you if you have not. There is a new trojan horse virus on the loose and it could come visiting if you use Kazaa or ICQ.

We spent the last couple of days looking at "cheaper" accomodations. Oh my gosh. The places that I found for 200.00 or 300.00 less than what we are paying are not fit for a dog to live in. Do I live in a mansion now and do I have a pride problem going on here? Absolutely not. I can garuntee you that these places are fully qualified rat traps complete with broken windows, tons of rust and lots of missing pieces. One trailer park owner assured us that he intends to renovate. I told Katy and the kids that the only renovation option left to this guy is to drop a nuclear device in the middle and start over after the radiation kills off all of the garbage that is there now.

Living out of our cars and being homeless are just not an option as you can imagine. I spoke with my landlord today and he told me he would be willing to reduce our rent to 600.00 per month and as long as we paid that amount anytime during that month that he would allow us to remain. Once we find gainful employment and are back on our feet then he will raise the rent back to 750.00. That is the BEST offer that I have gotten to this date. I told him that I certainly appreciated his willingness to help us and that we would be more than able to accomplish this task with what we are receiving in unemployment.

If the cell phones have to be turned off then so be it. If cable has to go then so be it. We will have to do what we have to do to make sure we have a roof over our heads while we are looking for gainful employment. After driving around for the last two days looking at rat traps and the accomodations that others have to live in I feel SUPER blessed and we are MORE than motivated to do what we need to do to stay where we are.

This evening Katy got a call from the manager at a Chucky Cheese. They have several openings and Katy has an interview at 2:30pm on Monday. We got a big kick out of the fact that they have an opening for one of the characters. That would certainly be appropriate for me since I can be a character at times.

On two seperate occasions today I was reminded of the loss of our Jessica and how painful it still is. It seems as if the emotions are right under the surface only to be awakened by the right stimulus. Today I watched a movie and a TV show where a loved one was lost. This rekindled my feelings of loss and that loss is still painful. The pain is just as real today as it was on August 5, 2001 as I watched the funeral home director remove my daughters lifeless body from our home on 159 Mapleridge Dr in Goose Creek SC.

It is still so hard to believe that we will not see our Jessica again this side of eternity. It is still so hard to believe how cancer changed our little girl right before our eyes. I was reminded that I need to light a candle for my "sunshine angel". I had not done that in a very long time. I guess the act of lighting a candle helped me in some way but it also reminded me of the truth of what has happened. Our lives will never be the same and even though Jessica is gone she will always be in our hearts, souls and minds.

We love you Jessica Ann Moffitt , You are our Sunshine!!

To move or not to move, that is the question. Today is April 4 and I am still under employed and over appreciated. How in the world did we get to this point? The economy apparently sucks in the Upstate and we are so happy that we moved here. NOT!!!

We have come to the conclusion that staying at 4 Broken Past Ct is not financially feasible since we do not have the income to support the rent payment. We need to drastically reduce our expenses and the biggie is the rent. Luckily for me the ex wife is being flexible with regards to child support but that cant slide forever. I need a job and I need it now. Katy and I both are looking for work and thus far there is nothing. Katy might be able to find something sooner than me since she has a degree. I would have never thought it would have taken this long for us to find employment.

Katy got up at 5 am and went to Walmart to pick up some boxes. We are surrounded in cardboard boxes now. Wahooooo! Now we have something to occupy our time. Filling boxes with our belongings. We may have to have a moving sale so that we can get rid of some of our stuff. Depending on where we move to we might not have enough room for all of this stuff. The last thing I want to do is sell what we have. In August of 1997 we sold everthing that we owned and put the rest in two vehicles and moved to Douglasville Ga. That was a mistake then and it is a huge mistake now. When you are in survival mode you do what you have to do I suppose. Survival mode on.....

The important thing is that we have one another. We will survive this. We always have and always will. This too shall pass. We just need to suck it up and do what we have to do to survive. One day at a time sweet Jesus, that is all we are asking from you. Just give us the way to do every day what I have to do. Yesterday is gone sweet Jesus and tomorrow may never be mine.... Familiar words that we have sung over and over through the years but singing is much easier than doing at this point.

Ok, now to look beyond our family and the immediate needs. The biggest thing that seems to be going on now is the war with Iraq. We are on day 15 now. By now I would imagine that our troops are in Baghdad going from house to house and building to building engaging in urban warfare to root out Saddam Hussein's elite guard. It appears that the best that the Iraqi goverment can come up with is sneak suicide attacks in the form of suicide bombers. Several cars have blown up at check points killing everyone inside including coalition troops. Those are the acts of terrorists and not a military response to our invasion. How sad that is.

On the church front it seems that we have found a church that we like and it is called Marathon Community Church. You can visit the church web site at http://www.marathonchurch.org We love the praise and worship, drama team and teaching. This church is following the "purpose driven church" model which is modeled after the church in California called Saddleback church. April 6th has a membership class 101 from 3pm until 5pm and I think that we are going to attend if we can.

It has been FOREVER since I have drivled in here. How long is forever? Maybe I should say it has been a LONG time since I have said anything of worth in here. Perhaps today is the day that I speak up.

I am waiting for breakfast to arrive from Katy's kitchen and for Actifed to kick in to stop the raging allergy symptoms that have taken over this morning. I made the mistake of preparing to mow the yard and all the alergins known to man took over my sinuses. Whew, it was ugly.

It appears that operation Iraqi Freedom is in full affect as Allied forces are approaching the Iraq capital of Bagdad. Some say that this war will cause the economy to flourish and that the jobless folks like me will soon be employed again. Does it really take a war to make the economy flourish? How does that work? We use more bombs, we run out of bombs, we need more bombs, can you make us more bombs and therefore I go to work at a bomb factory even though I do not know squat about how to make a bomb? Hummmmm..... I can see where there would be more need for items that are used in a battlefield. I am not sure if that will create more technology jobs though.

I am on week 8 of unemployment or day 49 with no income other than the paltry 278.00 from SEC. Dont get me wrong, I am appreciative of the fact that we do have unemployment benefits since neither one of us is working. I thought that Katy's degree would help her to find even menial work like at Walmart but apparently there is a huge supply and demand problem. There are jobs but there are hundreds of applications being turned in for one job. I bet the employers love the applicant pool but they probably hate the process of figuring out who to hire and who to toss.

I have two contracts that recruiters have submitted me for. One is for a contractor positon in Washington DC and one is for a contractor in downtown Greenville. If this were a perfect world I would pick door number two. I would LOVE to find employment here locally. Push comes to shove I will go to Washington if I have to.

Thanks to Ebay I am making some suplimental income doing auctions. How sick of Ebay can a person get? On a scale of one to ten I am almost to an 8 with regards to how sick I am. Luckily for me I have a WONDERFUL wife that is willing to kick in some extra effort when I could care less about the whole thing. Thank you Jesus for Katy. :)

Ok, food almost here and I am famished. Talk to you later!

I am on forced vacation starting today thanks to my contract at Ahold ending without a whole lot of warning. I saw the writing on the wall and knew that it was coming but I was hoping that the contract would atleast last until April of 2003. No such luck boys and girls. Now I am back out on the Internet slinging my resume at every job board that can be found. Luckily for me I saw the writing on the wall in November of 2002 and started the madness then. The IT industry basically sucks for now. There are jobs out there to be had but the pay is way down and the employers want certifications and experience out the wazooo. This is an employers market now and they can pick and choose from a wealth of candidates.

I figure that we have about 2 weeks before I need to push the panic button and just take anything I can put my hands on. Katy and I know that if push comes to shove the kids go to public school and she goes back to work. Going back to work for Katy will be tough because she has not had to work outside the home for a long time. The awesome thing is that we are a family and we are committed to doing whatever it takes to survive. Surviving means lights, telephone, rent and food. That does not mean high speed Internet, cable tv or cellular service. All of that is extra stuff that we certainly do not need to survive. Will we miss those things? Yes, those things will be missed but we can learn to do without if need be.

If you think about it life would be so much less complicated without a lot of the things that I just mentioned. I am praying that God will provide and that I wont have to give up our wants or desires. The trick is to have faith and be patient and wait on Gods timing for all of this to come together. I am writing this sort of as a journal so that I can look back and praise God for meeting our needs once again.

While I am on forced vacation I will have the opportunity to hang out with the family and do family things such as bowling practice with the children today. Kristina and Justin are both on a youth bowling league where they are learning how to bowl. We had a blast today and I am thankful for the time to spend with my family. That means more to me than any amount of money that I might be able to put my hands on.
Our children are our investment that we are sending out into the future.

This is a picture of our front yard in January 2003 after the snow storm. We got 4 inches that day.








This is Justin Matthew Moffitt in the front yard of our house in Simpsonville.

Neat stuff, yes it is.....

First we lost the Challenger in 1986 and today we lost Columbia. At approximately 8 am CST NASA in Houston Texas lost telemetry data with Columbia and soon after that they lost audio contact with the astronauts. Debis from the space shuttle wound up scattered across the state of Texas and into Louisiana. We lost another 7 people to the space program. This is a sad day indeed.

Yesterday I lost my job at Ahold USA and once again I am seeking full time employment either as a contractor or a full time employee.
I have two recruiters that want to talk to me next week because I have been putting my resume on job search boards since November of 2002 when Ahold USA laid off 32 full time employees.

We are on the brink of war with Iraq as our military is gearing up for a major offensive half way across the world. Stay tuned, more to follow...

Have you ever had a tooth ache? If someone tells you their tooth hurts please feel sorry for them. Up until this date, January 22, 2003 I have never experienced the pain of a tooth ache. It took me 41 + years for it to happen and now Ambesol and I are very close friends. :)

I wonder how long it has been since I wrote in my blog? I bet it has been atleast 30 days, if not longer. I think that blogging is sort of like having a personal journal. I wonder what the difference is between a blog and a journal? That reminds me. I need to write a biography about myself for www.freelancewriters.com. I joined that site so that I can be listed in a database of freelance writers in the hopes of getting some writing assignments. I am using w.blogger version 3.00 to write this thanks to Chris over at Lockergnome. Chris has a LOT of useful tips and applications that he tells us folks about. So, we shall see what this freeware interface does for the blogging experience.

I have been looking for a full time job or a better contract since Ahold laid off 36 people this last November. Thus far I have not found anything that appeals to me. A position came available for a Network Administrator in Myrtle Beach but they only offer 47k to 49k to start. They are asking for the world for that sort of pay. Gosh, maybe I am just down right spoiled and greedy aye?

Speaking of Myrtle Beach. Katy and I spent last weekend at Ocean Reef Hotel in North Myrtle Beach at our second attendance at renaissance Weekend which was hosted by Happy Days and Special Times. There was a reporter there that was doing a story so hopefully we will get a copy of it through E-mail. That would be cool enough. :) This year was better than the first since we hooked up with Anthony and Gale Keech who are our new found crazies here in the Upstate. :)

Gosh, Ambesol IS my best friend. As long as the pain is subsided I am a happy camper for now. Tomorrow, I make a local Dentist a friend and I plan to contribute part of my budget to him. :)

I feel my blood going hot here. I find myself surrounded by people that are professing Christians who are experts at describing what a problem is but not as adept at finding a solution to the problems that have been infecting our society for centuries.

Our world is being invaded by an infestation on multiple planes and the best that we can all do is complain about it and describe it in all of our fantastic verbiage.

Don't get me wrong folks. We need to IDENTIFY the problem. Now we need to do the next thing, which is to do SOMETHING about it. My question to each of us is simple. WHY is pornography so rampant in our society? Why is SEX such a commodity? Why does the church of the living God stand by quietly while church members are sucked into this evil lifestyle and when they admit they need help it is swept under the rug and they are told that their behaviour is normal. When is the church of the living God going to direct and train their membership to true accountability and restoration?

How many churches in America are modeling the BPM program like that of Central Church in Tenn? Why aren't there more men of God who are taking this program to the streets and the churches of America?

How many of us are spending more time fighting the sexual addiction in our own lives in a topsy turvy roller coaster ride vs finding true victory and helping others to be restored?

We have the knowledge. We have the technology and we have the leadership and the finances. We need to figure out how we can use what God has given us to ERADICATE this garbage from the church of the living God FIRST and then when those folks are fired up and out of the closet and restored then we can form an ARMY of the living God that we are supposed to BE and go crash down the GATES OF HELL.

I am sick of just talking about this. Who amongst us is willing to spend their money, time and talents to actually do more than wallow in sexual sin and mere acknowledgement of the issue?

Yes, Battle Plan Ministries is here. Setting the Captives Free is alive and well. Love in Action is alive and well. How many other PROGRAMS do you know of that are in place and doing their part to put a dent in this problem? My point is simple. God does not need a program. God needs YOU and ME to be willing to stand up for what we believe in and take a REAL STAND in our communities.

I submit to you that the church of the living God is way too passive, complacent and weak to make a dent in most of the problems we see plaguing our society. What about our leadership? Where are our Under Shepherds in all of this? Why IS it that our church members are struggling with alcohol, drugs, sexual addiction, gambling and spousal abuse? Why IS it the church of the living God is not yanking all of this SIN out of the closet and doing something REAL to address the issues and call sin a sin and restore people to either righteousness or casting the garbage out of the church.

The answer to most of those questions should make us physically ill when we face the truth. We are way too happy in our suburban homes with our suburban lifestyles and our stuff. Why is it that only 10% of the church do 100% of the work? The world around us may not embrace a relationship with Christ. That doesn't mean that they are deaf, blind and dumb. They can watch and see how much effort is being put forth within our churches and what type of affect it is having in our lives Monday through Friday. If some of these issues really bothered us then would we not be willing to do something, anything to make a difference?

The sad fact of the matter is this. If the problem is not hitting close enough to home then we take the stance of indifference. We would rather make a fuss about our next door neighbors dog barking in the middle of the night causing us to loose sleep than to get out of our comfort zones and security bubbles to make a difference in real issues that are affecting our very way of life.

I submit to YOU my friends and co laborers in Christ that we are NOT doing enough. There are victims and predators all around us. Through the power of the living God we CAN and SHOULD be making a DIFFERENCE. The million dollar questions are as follows.

A. When will we get sick enough of being sick enough of the issues?
B. When will we pool our resources together and become a REAL church body that does what it takes to MAKE a real difference.

By myself I can not make a difference outside of the scope of my personal life or the life of my family. I can influence the people in the community that God has placed me in. I can move people emotionally and spiritually as I call them into battle. Only when we as brothers and sisters in Christ work together with the church leadership can we actually make a lasting difference in the world around us. Our leadership needs to be motivated to stop sweeping the problems under the rug. Our leadership needs to stop wasting our money on building programs and finding new ways to tickle the ears of the sinner's that are already taking up room in the church. Our leadership needs to be called into action to be the REAL church leaders that they are supposed to be so that they can lead US into the paths of righteousness for HIS NAMESAKE. Only then will the church of the living God make a lasting impression on this world.

What will you do to start this process? Whatever it is that you will do I want to network with you and help you in any way that I can. Together WE can and MUST make the difference. The world around us depends on us to do it whether they realize it or not.

Your servant leader
James Moffitt
Jesus Connect Ministries

On December 4th 2002 at approximately 7:30 pm the lights began to flicker and then finally went out for good. The lights went out because of accumulated ice and freezing rain that had been coming down all day. The power stayed out until that Friday Dec 6th around 4pm. The article directly below this drivel was written because of this event. :)

The cable service went out again after being off for 2.5 days and my mind is wandering aimlessly wondering what to do next. I spent 30 minutes playing Hyper Bowl on my computer and then wandered over to solitaire and quickly became bored. We came home from church after the Christmas play and dinner in hopes of curling up in front of the television to watch another showing of Alias. My wife and I looked at each other and voiced our concern about missing a continuation sequel to last weeks Third Watch program that is shown on Monday evening.

As I catalog and analyze within my mind all the different possibilities that I have for entertaining myself this evening it occurs to me that I am a slave to technology and modern conveniences. It was amazing to me how much I got done in the two and a half days while the cable service was out. During our loss of Cable TV and high speed Internet access I was able to find the time to do some office cleaning and organization that sorely needed to get done. When the modern conveniences are available to lull me into a sense of tranquility and otherwise occupy my mental attention I am able to let other things go in life that perhaps would need my attention.

Life is what we make of it and there is nothing wrong with modern conveniences. We all love electricity which provides us with power for heating, AC, appliances and power for our computers. How much time and energy is being sucked out of our days because of modern conveniences and technology? How much value is being added to our lives because of modern technology and how much is being taken away? Do we even think about what we might be missing because of our aversion to what modern technology makes available to us?

No matter how addicted you may be to modern day conveniences or technology the life cycle never stops. Life marches on and if you are not careful it will pass you by while you are lost in the haze. All around us we see advertisers trying to determine our self worth and our value to society by convincing us that we must have this and we must have that. Marketing firms spend millions trying to convince us that we can look younger, thinner and that clothing, cars, prestige, power and that special house will cause you to be successful. We are aware of the subliminal messages and even though we may not make a conscious effort to pursue the hyped up dreams of the advertisers subconsciously we are making note of what they are saying and if we are not careful we can get sucked into a trap that will cause us to chase our tails in the pursuit of obtaining all that we can get our hands on.

Television, Cable, Satellite TV, Internet, radio, news media in written form and other forms of media that I am probably forgetting capture a large portion of our attention span. Media outlets of all types provide us with one thing and that is information. How we receive the information, how often we consume it and finally what we do with it determines how much value it adds or subtracts to our lives. Information and misinformation is swirling all around us and it is our choice to control what comes into our minds and how we will utilize it.

How can this be you may be asking yourself. How can we allow all of this information which bombards us from every angle to control our lives and consume so much of our time. How can we manage our daily lives more effectively and use the technology as a tool which will add value to our lives? Some of you may even be in denial as you read this and think that you are not wasting any precious time and that there is nothing wrong with being entranced by the endless flow of information that is shoved down our throat on a daily basis. How many of us are just happy about the way things are and have no intention of even considering some of these thoughts?

My challenge to you is simple. Find a piece of paper and a writing instrument and make a list of tasks that need to get done around the house. These tasks could be anything. Tasks that take 5 minutes to accomplish or tasks that could be large enough to be projects that would take hours of your time every day to accomplish. When the task list for around the house is done consider doing a list of things that you need to do that involves your family. If you don't have an immediate family what about your relatives, parents, children etc? Is there anything that has been neglected there because of a lack of time to do it? Think about any area of your life that would require time and attention to get things done. How big is your list getting to be now?

I am as guilty as you are. I love these modern conveniences and technology and flow of information that comes from it all. I believe that when Mother Nature dumps tons of ice and snow on us and causes all of our man made technology to come to a grinding stop because of power failure I believe that it gives us time to stop and consider all of this.
I am not advocating that we throw out our coffee pot, dishwasher and personal computers for the sake of getting back to oneness with our neighborhood or community. What I am advocating is that we take a step back from the daily madness and consider how much time is being utilized for the good of our humanity vs. just wasting our time and being yet another avenue of endless entertainment.

Okie dokie, I just thought about breakfast. :) I will get to that soon enough. I had to go into my blogger settings and update everything and make it current. New email address, postal address , phone numbers etc... I even changed my description.

Enjoy !!

Does anyone ever read this drivel? Do you? If you do please send me a short note at jcmoffitt@charter.net and tell me so. If you do that will encourage me to continue my blathering in cyberspace. :) Is there such a word as blathering? Sigh....

Well, week one at our new place in Simpsonville SC is almost complete. We moved in our new place last Saturday and we are STILL un packing boxes and playing house. :) We have a fireplace, 2 bathrooms, a fenced in yard and a kitchen that Katy just loves. You know what they say. When mom is happy the whole house is happy. Well, Katy is pretty happy about our new digs. So the rest of us are living in pleasantville for now. :)

We really do live out in the country now. It takes about 5 minutes to get to the ONLY 2 stop and robs down the street but other than that it is a 30 min drive into town. Wahoo. We love it!

My new job (contract) is on week number 5. There were some bumps and glitches along the way but I think that things have smoothed out a bit. Praise the Lord for that. Whew. I was starting to wonder what I had gotten into. I went from idle to running at mach 3 with my hair on fire. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.

Today we will put together a new entertainment unit. Tomorrow we will look for a new church home. Actually, tomorrow just starts that maddening process where we go from church to church hoping and praying that we can find where we are supposed to be. It took us 6 months to do that in Goose Creek and I literally had to wind up in the hospital to meet our new pastor. Geeesh, hope that does not have to happen this time. :)

I think that my tummy is calling me to breakfast and I know that I must obey or I will be severely punished. :)

Moving towards the finish line

I spent three hours with my friend Derek yesterday at his house. It looks as if Derek is going to be going down a different path with regards to what he is doing with cell groups and ministry at his home church. Derek asked me to take over leadership of the existing cell group as he goes down this different path and will be making the announcement of his changes on this next Thursday. I told Derek that I would be honored to take over the small mens group on Thursday. We discussed bringing the men to a finish line quickly. Some of the men have been walking with Derek and the sexual purity accountability group since January. Some of the men for only 2 months. Derek and I agreed that while support groups and cell groups are great and a good way to connect to other men and bring healing to the hurting that it also can bring the trap of being an enabler for men to abuse grace. In other words the trap for some folks would be to grow comfortable in the thought that the cell group will always be there and that they can loose sight of the goal. If the cell group just goes on forever and people just cycle in and out of the ever turning washer machine type mentality then there will be some folks who will never reach the finish line.

So, with that said we will be proposing to the men that it is time to put this issue to rest, once and for all in their lives. When we say that we want to bring the men to a finish line it does not mean that we think they will never be tempted with sexual impurity again but it does mean that we will get to a point where we decide that we will put to action those principles that we have learned about sexual purity and then get on with our lives. Yes, some men will stumble and fall and they will need some follow up work from time to time but we also believe that there should be a time of accountability and maturity and responsibility where the men take possesion of the issues and finally make the decision to break free.

When we bring the men to the finish line I will be proposing that we start a series using either the PK workbook we got in Raleigh, Maximized Manhood by Ed Cole or Man in the Mirror.



James Moffitt
http://www.jesus-connect.net/jcmoffitt
jcmoffitt@jesus-connect.net

Peering down from the mountain

Can you imagine how Peter or Matthew might have felt after spending a weekend with our Lord listening to his teachings and watching how he walked amongst the people? They must have been breathless and amazed at our Lord as he ministered to the many needs of the people and shared inspiring and life changing concepts while connecting to them in a real way. I can not compare my experience at PK 2002 in Raleigh North Carolina to that which I have just described but I can say that it was a definite mountain top experience.

I was aware of this event approximately 1 week before the event due to hearing about it at a bible study group that I attend on Thursday evening. As the men were talking about the preparation to finally go to this event I figured that it was too late for me to make any preparations and I considered thinking about a PK event in 2003 to attend.
It seems that I was destined to go and a ticket for the PK event was provided for me free of cost due to some one else who was unable to make it to the event. I am sorry that this person was unable to make it but I am glad that I was able to go. I was blessed richly to say the least. God touched my heart in so many ways that I am bursting at the seams with all that I saw and heard.

The first PK event that I attended was in Irving Stadium, Irving Texas in 1994. At that time I also had a wonderfully powerful experience in which I felt that there was NOTHING that could separate me from the love of God and that the gates of hell would not be able to prevail against me. One thing that I was not prepared for after attending this event was the horrible onslaught that the enemy brought against me in the weeks to come. I will address that later on in this document as we consider peering down from the mountain and the eventual trip off the mountain back down into the valleys of life and the approach to the gates of living in reality.

One of the things that impacted me at both events was the large number of men from all races, creeds and denominations who planned to come together under one roof and praise and worship the Lord and receive Godly instruction and encouragement. So many times in life the secular media focuses only on the negativity of the world and the horrible consequences that can happen because of our sin nature. How often do we see them observing and reporting on 14000 men who represent a cross section of the church in 2002? I would venture to say not often enough. The praise music was awesome and the teaching was tremendous. There was enough "milk of the word" for brand new converts and enough "meat" for those of us that have been on a life journey with Christ.

Storming the Gates was the theme and the color was RED. Red signified the blood of the lamb and white signified the fact that we as believers and Disciples of Christ have been washed in that blood and that we are a royal priesthood and a royal generation. The entire focus of this Promise Keepers event was to remind men that we are in a special and unique place within our society. We have the ability to change the history of this world IF we choose to embrace our Godly heritage and take up our cross and follow the Lord no matter where he leads us or what task he gives us to do. We were encouraged and commanded to stop being passive with regards to our relationship with the Lord and with our families, churches and communities. We were encouraged to defeat our fears and to put on our armor and to fight the good fight, to storm the gates of hell. We were encouraged to walk out our salvation with trembling and fear. We were reminded of the fact that one of our roles is to be the leaders that our families desperately need. As Godly men we should serve our wives and our children in such a way that they will know and understand who God is. We were told that our families are our first ministry and that there are no other ministries before that. Once we get our homes in order before God and take the necessary steps to rid our lives of worldly junk then we will be able to withstand the darts of the enemy and lead other people to the cross where the power of the holy spirit and the integrity of our relationship with Christ can change those folks for eternity.

I came back from this mountain top experience realizing that there were areas where I need to grow and how that need for growth is only causing me to become stagnant in going to the next level with the Lord. God's desire is that we will be fruit bearers and that fruit will bring forth other fruit for the kingdom. In 1 John 1:8-10 tells us that if we say that we have no sin that the truth is not in us and Gods word has no place within us. Spiritual arrogance costs way too much and there are too many people that are headed to eternal separation from God for me to be playing games and thinking that I have arrived. My natural inclination is to be my worst judge and to condemn myself. The enemy, over the years, has always battled against me in this area and I have always had to struggle to find the balance I need to know the difference between spiritual growth achieved and areas I need to grow in without condemning myself and coming up with feelings of hopelessness. One of the speakers made a statement that made me cringe. He said that Christ is the head of the church and He was willing to give up His life for her. Likewise we as Christian men who are married should be willing to serve our wives and families even unto death. He further challenged us in the fact that we will never be able to fulfill that role until we are able to give up the remote control to the television. How can you die for your wife when you won't relinquish the controls to the TV?
I think that you could hear 25% of the oxygen being inhaled as men all over the sports arena realized an area of their lives that needs to be worked on. I need to show my children and wife through my actions that I am willing to be a servant leader in my home. Talk is cheap and I need to put feet to my love for them.

I was challenged in the area of prioritizing my time. One speaker reminded us that the only way that we are going to be able to put on the full armor of God and storm the gates of Hell was to be the warrior for God that we should be. He encouraged us to remove all the junk and garbage and ungodliness out of our lives and prioritizing our time so that we can equip ourselves to fight in the battle. We were reminded that our armor does not protect us from the rear and only from the front. We were reminded that God asks us the same question that he asked Peter. Do you love me more than these? God was using fish as an example of things that Peter loved more than God but each of us can easily choose the things in our lives that represent the fish. I am sometimes challenged with prioritizing my time and I need to spend less time in front of the idiot box (TV) and substitute that time that I regain by connecting to my family and spending more time in studying Gods word and praying. I need to disconnect from all the things in this world that are hindering me from being at my fullest potential for the kingdom of God.

I was also challenged in the area of connecting with other men and developing godly relationships where I can be not only a mentor but also be mentored. Spiritual arrogance, pride and having been hurt by other Christian men and churches in the past cause me to be on the defensive and to be very cautious of whom I open my heart to.
I know that in order to go to the next level with the Lord and to be the Godly Man He wants me to be that I need to get past this and to learn how to trust again. It is so easy for me to hide behind ministry and to mask my spiritual inadequacies and needs by ignoring them and helping others. I was challenged in the area of being sensitive to the needs of others despite what I might think. I was reminded that Paul stated that we should try to be all things to all men for the sake of reaching them and drawing them closer to the cross.

This week we will spend time climbing down from the mountain top experience at PK 2002. It is totally up to us how we choose to allow this experience to affect us. We will either choose to cut out another PK notch on the spiritual belt buckle and ride the wave of emotional warm "fuzzies" until they run out OR choose to recognize the areas of my life where growth is needed. Time is short and the fields are white unto harvest. The work is plenty but the workers are few. There is no time for being passive and complacent while the world around us is headed to eternal separation from God. We need to spend time on our knees asking God to cleanse us from all unrighteousness and to surround each of us with other godly men, teachers and preachers that can help us to be equipped to be a mighty warrior and army for God. We need to get on offense and move forward against the enemy and be proactive instead of defensive.

In 1994 I was caught off guard and did not realize just how angry that I had made our enemy. Luckily for me God used a friend of mine that had already connected to me to help me to crawl out of the hopelessness and depression that the attack caused in my life. My friend redirected my focus and helped me to remember the vision that God had given me and showed me that God does not expect me to be perfect. God expects for me to be obedient and to take my life one day at a time and to leave the battle to Him. God is much more powerful than I am. My friend showed me that I could not defeat the enemy in my mind by myself. My friend showed me that I needed to connect to other Christians and to draw strength from them so that I could find the hope and get back into the battle.
In 2002 I expect the enemy to attack and I will determine to connect to other men in my life who love the Lord and will allow me to join in the offensive with them as we determine to storm the gates of hell together.

It is always good to return home even if it is from a mountain top experience. The thing about mountain top experiences is that they are useless if you do not appy those things that you have learned to practical every day living.

In 1994 I went to a Promise Keepers event and that was a mountain top experience that caused me to ultimately come under attack by the enemy. I came under heavy condemnation by the devil as he showed me that there is NO way that I could ever become the man that God wanted me to be. Satan is a liar and a deceiver. He is right that I in my own flesh and ability and sin nature can not become who God wants me to be. The only way that I can become the man God wants me to be is to strip myself of all ties to this world and to submit myself to Him and learn how to be a servant leader to God, Family and church. As I submit myself to God and to being a servant leader in my home then God will be able to mold me and shape me into His image.

Promise Keepers 2002 was just as incredible as 1994 in that it was a mountain top experience and I came away with a lot of meat to chew on for the next year. In this next couple of weeks I will pour over my notes and pick out those things that God showed me and share them with you. I know that I have some adjustments to make especially in the area of being a servant leader. I know that I have some areas of pride with regards to being a servant leader in my home that I need to work on. One of the simple ways that I can improve my being a leader in my home by serving my family such as giving up the remote control and letting the family watch what they want to watch while I am there.
Instead of making my family a gopher (go for this and go for that ) I should get off my lazy duff and go do it myself for a change. Sometimes the small things make a world of difference.

Well, it is time to be the Godly Man and leader that I should be and lead my family into the face of God by taking them to church. More good stuff to come folks, please stay tuned to this channel.

God bless

I went to bed at 10:30 pm after taking a wonder drug called a sleeping pill. I have always said that sleep is such a huge waste of time. How many years do we waste lying flat on our back taking up oxygen and being useless? LOL.... I figure that I could get a LOT accomplished during the hours that I am spending sleeping. Then again, I dont waste a lot of time sleeping since I am up at 2 am after 4.5 hours of sleep. The same thing happened to me last night. Go to bed at 12:30 am and get up at 5 am to go to work. I work 6 am until 2:30 pm at the Weapons Station. Some afternoons I am able to sleep for several hours and that helps to recharge the batteries. I tried to get a nap today and no such luck.

I am taking off from work on Friday and heading out to Raleigh NC for a Promise Keepers event. I am looking forward to being blessed by the ministry of Godly men at this event and enjoying being around alot of other godly men. My last PK attendance was in 1994 at Irving stadium in Irving Texas. There were 50,000 men in attendance. What an awesome 2.5 days that was. You could say it was a mountaintop experience.

August 5 will be here before we know it. That will be exactly one year since our Jessica has been absent in the body and present with the Lord. It is so hard to believe that this has happened. It is almost like a horrible nightmare that never happened. Then again we are reminded that the nightmare is an actual reality since she is not here anymore.

I have been attending a mens bible study and accountability group on Thursday evenings for the last couple of weeks. Some of the men go to Cathedral of Praise on Ashley Phosphate rd and some of them go to area churchs. Derek Smith, who lives close to me has started this group and started to invite me to come. We began to visit COP several weeks ago and really enjoyed it. I think that we plan to continue to attend on the Saturday evenings that we have available. The children seem to enjoy the childrens ministry there.
Our home church, Grace Fellowship in Goose Creek seems to be struggling with attendance still. It seems as if we take one step forward and go back three steps.

I was blessed by an annual raise of 3% today. Wahooooo. That is something to Praise the Lord about. Ok, it is 3:15 am and 5:30 is right around the corner. I am going to sign off shortly and go back to bed......

Greetings

Slowly but surely we are rebuilding the Jesus Connect web site. One of the additions that is ready for release is our private newsgroup server. You can find the following instructions on how to join this private newsgroup server at http://www.jesus-connect.net/faq/faq_13.htm

Send an e-mail to help@jesus-connect.net
Provide us with the following information.

Requested Login name and password
Real Name
Phone Number
Address
Brief paragraph on why you want to join the newsgroup server
This is a private news server and we reserve the right to grant or revoke membership priveleges.
Incomplete information will be deleted.

The content of our private newsgroup server will be Christ and family oriented. There are approximately 20 different topics to choose from. If you are familiar with the Usenet Newsgroups you will know that it is a wild free for all where anyone can post anything they want unless it is a moderated newsgroup.

Jesus Connect Ministries does have an unmoderated Usenet Newsgroup which can be found at
"Google Groups" at alt.religion.christian.jesus-connect. If you visit this newsgroup you will see that there are some folks there that post who love God and have good intentions of sharing the gospel of Christ and then there are those folks who are there to be totally disruptive. If you are "thick skinned" and can wade through and past some of the ugliness then this would be a good place for you to flex your "apologetics muscles" but if not then our private news server would be the route to go.

God bless




James C. Moffitt Jr.
jcmoffitt1@comcast.net
http://www.jesus-connect.net/jcmoffitt/index.html
People dont care how much you know until they know how much you care !

Yeah! This is SATURDAY and we got to sleep in until 8 am. Whoaaaaaa, what a deal that is. We normally get up at 5 am Monday through Friday so I am thoroughly enjoying this lazy morning.

I wanted to follow up on my previous post of what it means to be an American and what folks should do IF they dont like where they live.

I was not born here. I am a naturalized citizen which means that I had to live here for X amount of years and meet certain requirements BEFORE the US Government would consider me a citizen. One of those requirements was to be able to speak the English language and to say the pledge of Allegiance. I remember that day in Federal Court in Dallas Texas as if it were just yesterday. I believe that I was 13 years old when I became an official citizen of the US.

My parents were military and thanks to being adopted out of an orphanage in Ashofenburg Germany I am now enjoying the freedom and priveleges of being an American. If I had not been adopted along with my blood sister we would have experienced a much harsher life.
At the age of 8 years old the boys in the orphange were forced to go out and earn money and bring it back to share with the rest of the children. When my adoptive parents found me I had very little to my name. I was 1 years old and had a cast on my right leg up to my knee cap. If it were not for my parents being in the military, adopting me and giving me the many operations they did on my club foot I would never have walked. My sister was blind in one eye and there was no hope that she would ever see right. At the age of 17 my sister took her drivers test and eye exam without glasses and passed.

Just this last week a judge on an appellate court decided that saying the pledge of allegiance was unconstitutional. Was he smoking some serious drugs when he came to that conclusion??

How much JUNK do you get in your e-mail inbox?? This is one e-mail that I want to share with the world. Yes, I am an American too and I am SO very PROUD to be one. No, our way of life is not perfect and we have our own unique trials and tribulations that we have to work on. Show me a culture, society or race of peope that do not.....

If you dont like what you see below let me encourage you to find a better place to live.
______________________________________________________________________


If you want to be an American, then BE AN AMERICAN


After hearing that the state of Florida changed its
opinion and let a Muslim woman have her picture on her
drivers license with her face covered, I believe this is
even more appropriate. Read on, please!

This is an Editorial written by an American citizen,
published in a Tampa Newspaper. He did quite a job; didn't
he?

IMMIGRANTS, NOT AMERICANS, MUST ADAPT.

I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are
offending some individual or their culture.

Since the terrorist attacks on Sept. 11, we have
experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of
Americans. However, the dust from the attacks had barely
settled when the "politically correct" crowd began
complaining about the possibility that our patriotism was
offending others.

I am not against immigration, nor do I hold a grudge
against anyone who is seeking a better life by coming to
America. Our population is almost entirely composed of
descendants of immigrants. However, there are a few things
that those who have recently come to our country, and
apparently some born here, need to understand. This idea of
America being a multicultural community has served only to
dilute our sovereignty and our national identity.

As Americans, we have our own culture, our own society, our
own language and our own lifestyle. This culture has been
developed over centuries of struggles, trials, and
victories by millions of men and women who have sought
freedom.

We speak ENGLISH, not Spanish, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese,
Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to
become part of our society, LEARN THE LANGUAGE! "In God We
Trust" is our national motto. This is not some Christian,
right wing, political slogan. We adopted this motto because
Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded
this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is
certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our
schools.

If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another
part of the world as your new home, because God is part of
our culture. If Stars and Stripes offend you, or you don't
like Uncle Sam, then you should seriously consider a move
to another part of this planet.

We are happy with our culture and have no desire to change,
and we really don't care how you did things where you came
from. This is OUR COUNTRY, our land, and our lifestyle.
Our First Amendment gives every citizen the right to
express his opinion and we will allow you every opportunity
to do so.

But, once you are done complaining, whining, and griping
about our flag, our pledge, our national motto, or our way
of life, I highly encourage you to take advantage of one
other great American freedom, THE RIGHT TO LEAVE.

Please pass this along if you agree.

It is flooding here in Charleston. In another 2 hours the yard will disappear into the ditch which is now a pond and the yard that was once there will be a sink hole. Our double wide trailer will turn into a modern Noah's Ark as we begin to float down into the woods and then slowly rise above the trees and then over the power lines. I hope the electricity has shorted out by then so we dont turn into big fish in a sardine can.......

It has been forever since I have written anything in my blog but since there is nothing else to do other than imitate a gold fish while I look outside at the torrential down pour I might as well write something.

I got up at 5:30 am this Saturday morning so that I could go pick up Kristina Lynn from church camp in Batesburg SC. Batesburg SC is located just the other side of Columbia SC out in the sticks. Apparently the state offices for Church of God of Prophecy are located in Batesburg and that is where the camps are hosted. Justin and Kristina both attended so hopefully they both had a lot of fun. On July 1, 2002 we will be taking both of the kids to the annual Happy Days Camp which is also located in South Carolina somewhere up I-95 out in the woods.

Katy goes to work today at 3pm and if the rain does not let up I will probably have to take her so that she does not have to fight the inclement weather. That means that I will be getting in the car at 12 midnight to go get her. JOY !!

It appears that while Jesus Connect Domain is still a valid Internet Domain and my friend and founder Reynold Deguzman has erected a Linux Server on his cable modem service things are moving pretty slowly with development. Will Jesus Connect Ministries ever revive? That is the million dollar question at this moment. The last time I looked the website was still a one line sentence stating that the web page is under construction. Oooops, just checked the url and now it is saying the page can not be displayed. Oh well.....

The only thing that is new on the church scene for us is that we aquired a new sound board and I was able to move from the HOT attic down to the sanctuary. What a blessing to not have to be in the heat. I located a young man at AKM Pro Audio who is interested in being our drummer and we are supposed to meet at the church this afternoon. That probably wont happen with the rain. As for membership, we lost one family and gained a couple more young couples. I am hopeful that our church will begin to grow in 2002.
I am teaching the teenager boys bible study on two Wed's per month and other than that I just run the audio / video equipment on Sunday morning. We have no Sunday evening service.

Ok, I guess that is it for now as far as the update goes. Be well, be safe and may the peace and love of Jesus Christ permeate each of your days.

God bless

As time flies on by

Can you believe that it is already May 1st 2002? I for one can not. Where oh where is time going to? When I was younger I heard that time flies by faster and faster the older you get. At the age of 40 this is really coming true in an alarming way. If you are older than me then you know what I am talking about.

On May 5th we will have been without our Jessica for 9 months. Walking through Grief Year 1 is an article in response to that milestone in our lives. Maybe I should call it a month stone instead of a mile stone. Is there such a thing? Katy has been working at MUSC now for about 2 weeks and today is her first paycheck out side of the home in approximately 7 years. On May 12th of this year Katy and I will be celebrating 12 years of marriage and on May 4th of this year our Kristina will be turning 10 years old.

Justin and Kristina seem to be adjusting to public school ok. We agree with the teacher that Justin needs to do 1st grade over again since he will be turning 7 next year. This wont hurt him at all. We are planning on going back to Texas in June for the first time in two years. It will be good to see the relatives again. We will go to Seguin Texas which is just outside of San Antonio to see Katy's sister, Lisa.

We are planning on finding a house to rent between now and July 1st of this year. We are ready to move from where we are at and find a bigger place with a fenced in yard for the children and our dog angel to play in.





James Moffitt
http://jcmoffitt
jcmoffitt@jcmoffitt.com

Walking through Grief Year 1

I come from the GREAT state of Texas. The long horn state where the highways and flatland never seem to end. One of the television commercials that I will have etched on my brain forever goes like this. How long has it been since you have had a bowl of wolf brand chili? Well, neighbor that is entirely too long. Wolf brand chili is one of those things that you can get in Texas that is hard to find anywhere else. My wife and I miss several things about Texas. The chili, authentic Mexican cooking and a soft drink called Big Red. We have been gone from Texas since August of 1997 and though I do not miss the big city living in Houston we certainly miss other things and people. We miss our family and friends that we left behind. Not only do we not miss the big city living but also we don’t miss some of the things that I remember about Houston. I don’t miss the traffic jams. I do not miss the heat and humidity. I don’t miss the sounds of sirens at all hours of the day and night. I do not miss the hustle and bustle of the big city. Houston Texas is a city that never sleeps.

As a father that is walking through the grief process I have to say that there are things that I miss about our Jessica and there are things that I do not miss. All of these things are elements of the grief that I have to work through each day and sometimes each week.
One of the things that I do not miss is the daily or weekly visits to the MUSC radiology and oncology department. I do not miss the quarterly check ups where we would have to sit in a room for several hours while a team of people would come into the room one at a time with their legal pads or clip boards with an endless stream of repeated questions. I do not miss the feeling of being a gold fish in a glass jar where we were some sort of specimen to be observed. I do not miss the never-ending battle of finding a parking place for the car and having to show the teller at the booth our handicap license plate so we could get out at no charge. I do not miss the knowing looks of the parents that I would pass in the hallways of the hospital as we would pass them with Jessica in her wheelchair wearing her hat over a hairless head. I do not miss the feeling of helplessness as I watched our Jessica loosing the energy to live as she would lay around on the couch wishing she could be outside playing with the other children.

What I do miss is Jessica saying “ Oh Daddy!” when I would say something silly or unexpectedly burp in her presence. I miss Jessica’s smile because when she did, it was from ear to ear and it would light up the room. No matter how glum I felt when Jessica smiled, especially in the last several months, it really brightened up my day. I miss the hugs from Jessica as she struggled to show her love and affection for me. I miss seeing Jessica’s courage as she fought to keep on living from day to day despite all of the treatments and examinations that she endured. I miss going to the mailbox and getting all of the post cards from all over the world from the Chemo Angels. I miss going to the mailbox and getting letters from parents just like you who wrote to tell us we were not alone. I miss watching Jessica interacting with other members of our church as they would move here from the sanctuary to the fellowship hall in her wheel chair or help her get out of the car to go inside the church.

I look back on those events now just as if it were yesterday. The pain is no less real or present in my heart. I remember the joys and the struggles. I remember the loss and the joy equally. As one day melts into another I recognize that this is going to be a long journey in which we learn how to live without our Jessica. Healing will happen slowly but surely. Healing will mostly come from within and there will be days that God will have to supernaturally reach down from heaven and do the work for us because we will be too weak and weary to cry out to Him for help. The difference between the memories of Jessica and Texas is that we can always drive back to Texas and experience the things that we missed the most. On this earth and in this plane of living we will not experience Jessica’s laugh or affection again. We have the hope that she is with the Lord and that we will see her again once our lives are over here on this earth.

My hearts desire is to be the father that I need to be to my other children despite my loss.
I want to know how to live through this grief process in a way that will not rip apart my existing family unit. I want to know how to be the husband and confidant that my wife needs as she walks through her pain. I want to know how to share my heart and life experiences through this all so that others that come after me or before me will be better equipped to handle their grief process. As I pour out my heart and thoughts and feelings my hope is that other men just like me will find refuge. We will not find refuge in knowing that someone else is in pain. We will not find refuge in knowing that someone else just like me is awake at night or is having a hard time concentrating at work. We will find refuge as we learn how to take the horrible grief and pain and channel it back to our Father who is in Heaven. There are a lot of books and resources that are available for those of us in grief to read but the only true source of healing is going to have to come from God. I started Fathers Refuge so that I could communicate with men who are learning how to live with the grief. I want men to know that it is ok to talk about pain. Men are not exempt from the harsh realities of pain.

As a man I know that it is natural for us to want to just hold it all in and appear as if nothing is wrong on the inside. The problem with doing that is that eventually the pain will surface. How the pain surfaces is up to us. How we choose to walk through the grief process is going to affect our relationships with our wives and our children. If you are not married then it will affect your relationship with your co-workers and friends.
As I walk through this process of grief I want to learn how to help men to learn how to open up and express what is going on inside. If you are the wife, mother, relative of a man who is walking through grief be sure and know that he is not doing ok and life is not just back to normal. He may appear to be ok but trust me when I tell you that he is not. Gently reach out to him and let him know that you are there for him. You do not need to have all the right answers because there are none. All you need to know is to let him know that while you do not understand the pain you know that it is there and you care. Sometimes just listening to a person talk will make all the difference in the world.

If I can help someone find refuge for their own personal storm as they walk through grief then please direct them to the e-mail and postal address below. I not only want to learn how to be healed, but I want to pass the healing process on to other men just like me who need a brother and a friend that understands. That is what Fathers Refuge is all about. You can contact me at Fathers Refuge Care of James Moffitt 159 Mapleridge Dr , Goose Creek SC 29445. E-mail address is jcmoffitt@jcmoffitt.com



James Moffitt
http://jcmoffitt
jcmoffitt@jcmoffitt.com

Good morning world! I woke up at 5:42 am as if it were a work day. Go figure. Now it is 6:35 am and my wife and I are sitting in front of our respective computer screens searching for new e-mail to consume. All that awaited me in Outlook 2002 was the ever present SPAM. People online begging me for my last hard earned buck. Delete, delete , delete and then delete some more.

April 8, 2002 marked the first day that our children, Justin and Kristina, entered the public school system here in Goose Creek. Katy also started her part time job at MUSC as a human services specialist. We are planning on moving out of the double wide trailer that we are in and into a house with a real back yard and a fence. We have a shopping list of what we are looking for. Well, actually, Katy made up the list. We are looking forward to living in a neighborhood that does not have a neighbor that has 6 rowdy children.

I am still at the Naval Weapons Station and it appears that it is possible that I will be employed there through the year 2003. NMCI is taking its sweet time in becoming a reality and the Jacksonville Command will not be touched for another year. I am hopeful to get some of my certification tests out of the way between now and the time I am kicked to the curb. As far as network administration is concerned I have arrived in heaven. I monitor 6 servers and the Network infrastructure that handles the PWC network and if everything is operating as it should I can study or read books or surf the web. I know guys that would kill for my job. :) Low stress environment. You dont find that in Corporate America these days.

Our Jessica has been gone now for 8 months and I sure do miss her. I miss her so much some days it is all I can do to breathe. I know that Katy likes the idea of going back to work because it probably helps her to take her mind off of thinking about Jessica.

Jeremy will be here for 42 days after June 7th and I am taking vacation from June 3rd to June 10th. I cant wait to see Jeremy, he will be 16 years old this month. It is hard to imagine that he is 16. Our son is growing up before our very eyes.

I am going to be transferring my jcmoffitt.com domain off of Register.com onto a web hosting provider that provides us more drive space, bells and whistles for my money. Register.com does not offer anything near what other providers are now. Katy and I need to work on getting our web site back online. I would like to get Jessica's memorial page back online as soon as possible.

I am talking with Reynold about getting Jesus Connect transferred from Network Associates over to another web hosting provider and putting up a basic website for Jesus Connect. I am not sure if Reynold is up to doing this so I am just trying to get him to atleast get the domain transferred out of his name over to the new hosting site so I can do something with it.

Kristina and Justin are going on a field trip today between 9 am and 3 pm so Katy and I will have the day to ourselves. That will be weird to say the least. Katy just told me that since the kids get out of school on May 30th and I am taking vacation on June 3rd through the 10th that we should plan a road trip back to Texas. Wahooo, that ought to be a blast.....
NOT.... We would plan on picking up Jeremy on the way back through Houston to SC.
This is starting to look like the Harry and the Hendersons movie.